Incoming freshmen, a grave duty has befallen upon you, to lead the Creative Writing department on the trek to reform our portfolio-utilization skills.

In other words, keep your stuff together. Literally. Never assume a CW assignment, once done, to be negligible, because chances are, it will end up on the list of items you should have in your portfolio at the end of the year, and you’ll end up tearing your room apart at two in the morning swearing you had that paper somewhere (I speak from personal experience only).

See, here at Creative Writing, we have a long-standing tradition of leaving our portfolios to the last second, but frankly, I think it’s a tad bit outdated. See how in the picture, the words fade and blur out at the vanishing point? Yeah, it doesn’t. It just kind of goes on and on and on, and the panic’s settled in when you finally take a good look at the pieces you’ve saved in your “CW binder”– a handful of poems, a short story or two, and maybe someone that acted in my play has a script? Collapsing on the floor and hyperventilating is no longer an option, because by that point, there’s paper everywhere and you just kind of run out of your room screaming (again, personal experience).

So. Learn from past mistakes, future Freshies, and keep up with your portfolio. I mean it. And will some kind soul please get on my case about it next year? I’ll make Jules bring you cookies. They’re to die for.